You may have "faked" your death mate, but you still may need someone to talk to. If you did it for attention because you are seeing how people would react, that's a bit silly. Despite this act people still did/ do care for you and it would be a great shame to hear of anyone dying. If you need to talk or anything just let me know, I have worked in mental health before and I have seen the signs, the best thing you can do is talk about anything, even just to take your mind off what ever is bothering you. just remember if you need anything just msg, I'm always free for a chat (and I have done some councillor work b4). People are always there for you, you just need to let them know what's going on with you